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Old 01-29-2010, 10:03 PM   #4
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not bad, could use a bit of detail. but it definitely has potential. i suggest elaborating on what happens when something gets kicked or smashed. for instance, "the alsius warrior was smashed against the wall by artec's shield, crushing his skull and killing him instantly"

of course you wouldnt want to use that again but it just an example.

looking forward to the next story
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